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Keywords:

• Now we're going to do

Comment: the most human thing of all:

Description: attempt something futile with a ton of unearned confidence and fail spectacularly!

Keywords:

• It makes sense right?

Comment: They're good so they're stupid and trusting.

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• Birth is a curse

Comment: and existence is a prison!

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• You humans have so many emotions.

Comment: You only need two: anger and confusion!

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• I saw this place that was at once

Comment: a Pizza Hut and a Taco Bell!

Description: I mean, oh! The mind reels!

Keywords:

• This is a real low point.

Comment: Yeah, this one hurts.

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• In this realm IHOP stands for

Comment: "Interdimensional Hole of Pancakes"

Description: You don't really eat these pancakes. It's more like they eat you.

Keywords:

• These four humans

Comment: are all I care about in the universe.

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• I got to ride a bike.

Comment: I put a coin in a thing and got a gumball.

Description: Oh, damn. I didn't even think to chew it. Missed opportunity, shoot.

Keywords:

• There's something so human

Comment: about taking something great

Description: and ruining it a little so you can have more of it.

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• Any place or thing in the universe

Comment: can be up to 104% perfect.

Description: That's how you got Beyoncé.

Keywords:

• Lies are always more convincing

Comment: when they're closer to the truth.

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• "Ya basic". It's a human insult.

Comment: It's devastating. You're devastated right now.

Keywords:

• We're all just corpses

Comment: who haven't yet begun to decay.